It's a widely known fact that Diggers are the ever-vigilant watchdogs of the internet, always ready to correct you when you're wrong. Never fear, gentle reader, for enlightenment is a mere five steps away!
- Global warming is a vast left-wing conspiracy perpetrated by the greater scientific community for the sole purpose of scamming more funds. And of course that funding comes from your taxes.
- Taxation is how the government steals hard-earned money from its citizens without providing any benefits (such as infrastructure, education, or defense) in return. Your income would be better spent on campaign donations for Ron Paul.
- Ron Paul is the only candidate worth supporting in 2008 because he will eliminate taxes, legalize marijuana, encapsulate the contiguous United States in an impenetrable bubble and launch it into a low Earth orbit.
Plus he won't censor your violent video games.
- Video games aren't as great as they were back in the good old days of [insert console you grew up with here]. The Xbox 360 has a 99.9% failure rate; the Wii isn't truly "next gen"; the PS3 has no worthwhile games and costs more than you make in a month. Thankfully you can still emulate Super Mario Bros. on your iPhone.
- Piracy is cool, honorable, and absolutely justified. Johnny Depp wouldn't mislead you, would he?
